I AM too sexy. for you....& you.....& you......

I’m HOT. I’m ALL THAT. I am 5’7” tall, 105 pounds, TIGHT. Blonde hair, blue eyes, legs for MILES, 34 DD and a size 2. Everywhere I go, I turn heads of men AND women. You want me, and you wish I were on your arm to be your “eye candy”. I can dress to impress in a business setting, black tie affair, or I can throw on shorts & a tank or bikini. and people stop. and look. My dazzling white smile puts everyone – men AND women - at ease, and my laugh makes everyone laugh. My sense of humor ROCKS. I’m intelligent, and can hold a conversation with anyone. Comfortably. I love sports, and can easily tell you the stats of anyone from Derek Jeter to Jake Plummer to Tiger Woods. I can hold my own on the pool table, at the bar, or on the course, and make the BEST nachos & wings for game night in. Your parents would LOVE me. I’m in no hurry to marry, and have never heard my biological clock “ticking”.

***beep beep beep***

oops, there goes my alarm. Time to wake up. and puke.