I'm way totally sad, and not in the waa sense either

Okay, this is supposed to be the "let's talk about ME" post right? Well, I've now started this post... about... 6 times. Yup. And this is what you get. A post about me unable to write about me which is really sad in a short bus kind of way (what's a shameless plug among friends?). Yeah. And so... what to talk about... my toe nails are painted fuchsia? I want to repaint my dining room a more appetizing butter-cream color and do away with the big-bird walls? In staring at my toes (how else does one come up with such a resounding statement as my toes are painted fuchsia?) I've realized that I have 11 bug bites on my feet. I hate nature unless it's in a zoo. But I love the animals. And really don't mind the bugs so much, even if they are REALLY fond of me, and my blood.

Wow, I guess I CAN talk about me. Look at that. Only? You have to change the phrase around and substitute a few words. So "Lets talk about me" gets changed to "Listen to me Bitch". Wow. Refreshing.

I know there are happy bouncy people out there. If you ever have the pleasure of speaking to me on the phone or in person, you would think I'm this happy uppity creature. I'm not. It's a good facade.

Here's 10 random facts about me.

• I miss my goth phase and which I hadn't grown out of it
• The same with my Theater phase (which lasted all of my youth)
• I'm profoundly dyslexic with words and letters
• Also with numbers but I can memorize stupidly long chains of numbers
• And do most math in my head, and I'm almost always correct
• I hate nature, but you already knew that... or you should if you've been paying attention and your eyes didn't automatically drift to the bullets which most people's will but whatever. Go back and read. NOW.
• I'm bossy. No, I mean like way bossy. Like Spence would really like it if I stopped acting like his mother now. Not his mother but his mother. You know what I mean.
• I want to be Patricia Cornwell when I grow up
• I refuse to admit that I may very well be grown up already (at almost 30) because it's too depressing of a thought
• I'm really sad that my food processor died many moons ago because I saw a recipe on 30 minute meals (Rachel Ray) last week that I'm dying to try and it's totally bumming me out.

Yeah, be glad, I think I'm done now.